Game Night

We recently moved into a small apartment. When we did, game night was cancelled indefinitely. We just thought there was no way it would be fun in a small crowded environment. We sold our couches, so there wouldn't even be places for people to sit.
Two weeks ago some of my family members came to visit me at work and begged for game night to be back on. With a heavy heart I told them there was no way. We are just too uncomfortable here. But I've missed my friends and my family. We decided to have a trial night. We crammed around the table and played games. We ended by 11 PM. Anyone who has been to game night before knows this means utter failure. If people leave before the cock crows something is amiss.
We tried it again this week.
Shame on us, but game night was over at 11 again.
We suck.
We started to wonder if there would ever be redemption for our long held tradition.
On Saturday, Sydney and Felicia came up to watch Adam's soccer game. They stayed all day and into the night. You would think by night time they would be tired of us. Yet, the party raged on. Brock, Whitney, Bryan, and Clayton and Melanie all joined us. We sat around the family room without couches. We sat on tables, floors, and kitchen chairs. No one minded. No one complained. The house didn't empty till after 2 AM.
We had so much fun with our family. I think that's the best part of it too. Every person that comes is family, in some way. Felicia is definitely my sister, which makes Bryan the slightly strange in-law. Mel is married in and since Brock is dating Sydney he has a temporary pass. We got to feeling good. We even took turns saying things we loved about each other. Isn't that sweet? Doesn't it bring a tear to your eye? It almost did to mine. We all know I'm a cry baby though. Anyway, the point is....
Game night is back!!!!

Times I've cried in the last two days.

1. When I got a review at work. My bosses focused a wee bit on the negative and crushed all feelings of pride I had in the job I was doing. Also, I am aware that I set feminism back a couple of decades by crying in the workplace. Sue me.
Emotion - Let down

2. While I was cleaning at work. The mere memory of the review made me well up. No drops actually escaped so I'm not sure this counts.
Emotion - Frustration

3. Work again. Trying to sell personal training to two of the craziest women I've ever met. They interrupted each other and told me about the other one's problem. Another "near-tear." This one actually made me well up because I cannot laugh in a customer's face and I was trying so hard to hold in the outburst that it broke through to my eyes.
Emotion - Near hysteria

4. When I got home and told Kyle about my review.
Emotion - Anger

5. Listening to the kids sing If I listen With my Heart in the car this morning.
Emotion - Gratitude

Life's a rollercoaster.

Either that or I'm bipolar...

California weather

Last night I got home at 9 PM. I was boiling and I asked Kyle to turn the air down. Today it is 1 PM and I'm freaking freezing! What is up with the world?!
Global warming perhaps?
Second coming maybe?
Most likely it was the energy drink I had at work making me sweat buckets.
Still, whatever happened to the gradual progression of seasons? Who does this weather think it is, changing on me so quickly!? I haven't had a chance to buy winter clothes for anyone or to get my boots out of storage.
....
Oooh! Boots!
Turtlenecks!
And I can gain 5 or so pounds and wear a thick sweater; noone has to know. Plus, pumpkin pie!!! Maybe I didn't think this whole rant through very well. Who am I to tell nature its job?

Emancipation

I kicked Caleb out of the house today. I'm not ready for this crap. He isn't even 4 years old. What a brat! Ugh!

It started like a lot of the battles in my house start. One of the boys, Caleb in this anecdote, was bugging Levi till he cried. I put Caleb in his room.
Caleb said he wouldn't do it again. But he'd already done the crime and he knows very well what the penalty is. So, he still had to serve his time. He cried. He screamed. He yelled, "I hate you!!!!"
Yeah.
Hold everything!
a. How does he even know to say that? Kyle and I don't say that kind of thing. I vaguely remember watching a show with them recently where the kid did that. No joke, I even wondered about the influence they were getting.
b. Nice try. I'm the only person on this planet that loves that kid enough to deal with him constantly. I know people might say that's silly, but try dealing with someone else's child for a while and see how unconditional you feel.
I took him outside to the front porch and I told him he can go find a family he likes, because I will not take care of someone that hates me; I shut the door in his face. He cried quite loudly and honestly, I felt like a wonderful trailer park family. Oh well, extreme times, ya know. I told him he could come back and live with us once he apologized. I left him out there another 10 seconds or so and then he said he was sorry. I let him in but sent him to his room. For good measure, I cried and told him he hurt my feelings. Not in a sweet "let's hug it out" way but in a "you can stay in room cause you're mean" way. I know it was totally childish, but sometimes it seems like they understand that better.
I'm pretty tough as a mom and this didn't get under my skin. The crying is, I'm sure, misleading. Trust me, it was just a bit of theatrics.
TBS seems to promote the idea that you aren't a good parent till your kid says they hate you. I must be an awesome parent; most folks have to wait till their kids are teenagers.

Murphy's Law

You know, I have no idea who Murphy is, but I think he must have been kind of a jerk. How else do you explain that the first day Adam wears his white uniform shirt is also the day they use blue paint?
Stupid $12 shirt is now a rag.
Screw you too, Murphy!
Ya jerk...

My kindergardener.

I was surprised at how well I did today. My first child went off to school. I shed no tear and felt no choking up. In fact, I was a little mad at him for getting weepy.
He got his first Father's blessing last night and that made me way more emotional. Maybe I just got it all out so I wouldn't ruin my makeup today. Or maybe I was just so thrilled to get a break from the little hellion that I was pleased to see him start his education.... Who knows?
Side note, I showed up to school at 12 to get him. He was in the principal's office. How come no one told me school ended at 11:40?!?
To be fair, there were 2 kids left in there. Out of all 20 or so students, I am only the 3rd to worst parent. Yay, me! And hahahaha to the two suckers I beat out!
Here's a picture of my sweetness.

Testimony

I don't like to bear my testimony. I never have. Even when I was 13 and at girls' camp I couldn't make myself do it. I've always had a secret fear that it was because I didn't have a testimony. I've always wondered if the right trial would come one day that blew me off course like I was nothing.
As I look at my trials though I realize I'm not doing so bad. Each time the refiner's fire grabs me I count my blessings, I pray, I fast. I do all the things ive been taught and I hold tight to my faith.
I've read a comparison of a testimony to light. For some people the light flicks on and all the darkness disappears. No more doubt or fear. For others a testimony starts small like a candle, building slowly but surely till they've got a raging fire. I figure is why I've wondered previously. I'm a candle kind of a girl. No angels have administered and the spirit has never been physically audible to me. But I've never doubted Heavenly Father's love for me, my testimony of Joseph Smith has always been in tact, and, most importantly, my love of the Savior and gratitude for the Atonement have always been strong. As my lines build and my precepts stack up, I find that the darkness is dissipating and I've got a light every bit as good as those that started with 90 watts.
I have a strong testimony of Heavenly Father's love for me. I know he looks after me and I know He hurts when I hurt. He gives me trials for the experience they provide. If I knew nothing else, this would get me pretty far.
A little bit of my testimony is built upon my marriage. I believe that Heavenly Father led me to Kyle early in my life because He knew that I needed him. He knew without him I'd make a mess of things. Kyle is my perfect match. He has every quality that I lack and though I don't believe in soul mates, I have a hard time thinking we are just two random wanderers who got lucky.
I'm grateful for the temple and for eternal families. The sealing ordinance is a great proof to me of Heavenly Father's love. I couldn't imagine heaven without my sweet family. All of them, Kyle, the boys, my parents, my siblings. I even look forward to seeing grandma Mary Jane again someday.
This was kind of random, I know, but I felt I needed to share my testimony and this is a much better option for me than public speaking.

Does this count?