Failure?

My plan for Levi was to breastfeed him for as long as possible. My sister Ashley is my inspiration. She is just hitting the 6 month mark with her son. What a champ huh? I haven't done it longer than 6 weeks with either of the first two boys and I was determined to make it!. First off, in case you are a man, let me tell you why this is hard.
1. You must stay within 30 feet of your baby at all times. Going out of the house has to be done in one hour increments just in case the wee one gets hungry. There is always the option of pumping and storing for times when you are away from home, but then you increase the demand and therefore the supply. If you stop pumping there is too much hanging around and that's just not fun.
2. You may have to give up foods you enjoy because your baby doesn't like them.
3. Baby doesn't get as full as formula babies so you have to feed them more often.
4. Hello! That tiny bag of bones already hijacked your body for 9 months. You think once you evict him you can get it back, but the truth is he still runs the show!
5. It's supposed to help you lose weight. For me, it hinders it. I am great at dieting, but you aren't supposed to diet when you are breastfeeding.
6. Public outings. Need I say more?
So, I know there are a million reasons why breastfeeding is good for baby. Hence, why I wanted to succeed this time.
Well, last week Levi was having a super rough couple of nights. I was afraid he was getting colic. He was just miserable and needing to be held all the bloody time! One night it got really bad. I fed him twice within a one hour period because it was the only way to calm him down. My mom suggested giving him formula and I shot it down. Heck no! 5 weeks old and he hasn't touched the stuff yet! I'm doing so good. After 15 or so more minutes of crying I gave in.
What a difference. My baby was immediately happy and full and relaxed. I continued formula for a couple of days and he was happy as a clam. I decided to let the gals dry up and continue formula.
I was sad that it came to this. I had been so proud of myself. I was succeeding! But then not...
I know a lot of people judge formula moms. I have friends who would not be happy and would lecture my poor boobs into shame. But you know who is happy? Me and Levi. So there. It's not failure if both Levi and I are happier because of it.